Rebecca Israel Bischoff
Miscellaneous musings of a Mom, speech-language pathologist, avid reader and writer, and incurable chocoholic.
Thursday, November 10, 2016
It's a Book Trailer!
My daughter made a trailer for my book, The French Impressionist. It's coming out very soon, December 6th, to be exact! I love what she did. Please watch the trailer and let me know what you think!
Monday, July 25, 2016
When Your Kid is a Reluctant Reader: What’s a Smug, Self-Assured Parent to Do?
Yes, I was a smug parent. I admit it. I figured reading
would be easy for my kids because I’m a reader. I adore the printed word. How
could I not, when my mother, a former teacher, read to us from infancy and took
us on weekly trips to the library? Our home was filled with books. Once when I
was a teenager, a friend was scared (her word) when she stopped by my
house and everyone, including both parents and all three kids, had a book in
hand. The TV wasn’t on; we were reading. Oh, the horror! Seriously, my idea of heaven is a place like the
library from Beauty and the Beast. It's always open. And, there’s chocolate.
Well, when I had children, I was certain they’d love books the way
I did. No problemo, right? Kid #1 fulfilled my expectations in every way and then
some. She loved to be read to, and she took to reading, drinking up the
letters, sounds, syllables and words like a parched dromedary in the desert. By kindergarten
she already knew basic sight words and was put in the highest reading group
right away. Now in middle school, she devours books and has read above her grade-level for a long time. *sigh* I patted myself on the back for a
job well done.
Enter kid #2. She loved to be read to, but she didn’t take
to reading. Not at all. She participated in a great preschool group taught by myself and other parents, just as I'd done with
kiddo numero uno, but that whole alphabet “thingy” never seemed to totally make sense to
her. I still vividly remember spending an entire extra week on the letter P. We ate popcorn and pizza, went to the pet
store to look at parrots, sang silly songs, traced and wrote the letter P ad nauseum, made letters out of playdo, and
everything else I could think of. When I was certain my child had that letter solidly in her sweet little head, I wrote a giant letter P on a paper and asked her what letter
it was. Her response? She shrugged, and
said: “I don’t know. What letter is
that?” Registering that child for school was humiliating, because when the time
rolled around, she didn’t yet know the entire alphabet. I still cringe as I
recall the expression on the kindergarten teacher’s face when she asked me if
my child had gone to preschool. When I explained I’d done it at home and with a neighborhood group, I got THE
LOOK. You know the one.
By that time, I knew something was going on. Being a speech-language pathologist, I suspected a
learning disability or a language delay. However, at that time I wasn’t
working outside the home and I no longer had access to the testing materials or
the ears of other professionals who could have helped me determine what exactly
was going on inside my kiddo’s head. So, my sweet, bright, funny reluctant
reader started school and continued to have a hard time learning her alphabet
and her sight words. It was tough for her to pay attention in class. Luckily, her teacher listened to me
as I expressed my concerns and frustrations, and agreed to have her tested for
speech/language and learning issues. Finally, things clicked into place. I
learned that my child has ADD, or Attention Deficit Disorder. This difficulty in
attending to the right things at the right times, or inability to focus,
impacted her learning and her social skills. Seeing the test results for the first time was a nice “Ah ha!” moment
for me.
Finally, I knew what was going on and knew where to go from
there! My daughter got additional help with reading and received language
therapy to build her vocabulary knowledge, which I implemented at home as well.
Guess what? She improved immensely at school, and caught up to her peers. Now
about to enter third grade, she can read at grade level. Woo hoo!
And guess what else??? She still doesn’t like to read.
Kids may be reluctant readers for many different reasons. If
reading is something that is hard for them to do, you can’t blame them for not liking to do it. But reading
is essential for success in school, and I’d also say it’s necessary for success
in life, frankly.
So, what to do??? I don’t have all the answers, here, but I
do have a few suggestions that are helping me support my daughter’s learning
and increase her interest in books.
1. Make
books part of your everyday life.
Obvious, but important. If your kid doesn’t see you read, why would she
think of it as a fun or an enjoyable part of life? If you spend hours watching Netflix or
keep your nose stuck to the screen of your smartphone for hours on end, what
does that teach your kid about the joys of reading? Whether it's from an actual book or an ebook, just read.
3.
Let them
read what they want. Grit your teeth and put The Hobbit aside. Let Harry
Potter go. If they don’t want to read a certain book find what they do want to read. I’ve had to learn to
accept all those “trademark” paperbacks, like the “My Little Pony” or
“Strawberry Shortcake” stories that make me want to puke because my daughter
was motivated to read them. Some day,
she’ll fall in love with Harry, I just know it!
4.
Read with
your kids, even when they’re older. My oldest still loves it when we read
together. (Don’t let her know I shared this.) We read out loud a lot in the evenings or during road trips. It passes the time and introduces reluctant readers to great
books they haven’t tried yet, while building their vocabulary by introducing
unfamiliar words in context.
5.
Try not
to make reading a chore, but DO make it a daily requirement. This is hard.
Since reading is difficult for many kids, by default it becomes a form of torture and
something that definitely isn’t fun. So, start a reading chart and reward your child for time
spent reading. Use whatever works, and find ways to motivate your child. For example, if a book has been made into a movie that your kiddo wants to see, require your child to read
small parts of the book, even if the entire thing is beyond them. Then, read the rest
of it out loud or have your child listen to the book on CD. Once they've read or at least heard the entire book, reward them by letting them watch the movie version.
6.
Get
professional help, if possible. My
kids like me as Mom. They do NOT like me as “teacher., tutor, speech therapist, etc.” For that reason, it
often helps if I enlist outside help for challenging homework or difficult
projects. There are lots of after-school
programs and tutoring services available. If it’s feasible, try extra reading
help from an outside source.
Love your kid. Accept her the way she is. She is a reluctant reader, but that doesn’t make her any less valuable, does it? It certainly doesn't that mean you love her any less. Don’t get sucked into the comparison trap when other parents start bragging about how great or talented or mind-blowingly brilliant their kids are. Don’t let it make you feel bad when your kid doesn’t seem to measure up in every possible way. Just remember, your child is perfect the way she is.
So, long story short, this has been a challenge for me. Kiddo Number Two
made me question myself and humbled me to the dust. To the dust, people!! I had to
let go of my smug assumption that I “knew it all” and would raise a couple of
book-loving nerds with ease. She made me realize that I don’t have all the
answers and that’s okay. She reminded me that every kid is perfect just the
way they are.
Friday, September 18, 2015
Let's Start at the Very Beginning...
Maybe telling a story is a bit like running a race. Hang with me, here. It makes sense that you don't start your story or your race BEFORE you get the signal to start. It's kind of like the writing advice I've heard a lot, which is: begin your novel the moment when everything changes.
That would be like the moment you hear the starting gun go off and everyone starts to sprint.
Well, at least that's the lame analogy I came up with in my head. Apparently, it's not a very good one.
Twice now, I've entered contests, and I've been given the same advice for two different novels. Basically, it was: "You started your book too late."
In other words, I didn't begin telling the story right when everything changed in my main character's world. I started my story a while AFTER everything changed.
Oops. I guess you can say I was trying to drop the reader into the middle of the action so that they'd be hooked on the story and want to keep reading. Unfortunately, I may not have given the reader enough of "set up" of the story so that they got an idea of who the main character was, what was going on, and established some stakes so that the reader would begin to empathize with the character and understand all he or she stood to lose (or gain).
So, to go back to that race analogy, I guess that sometimes it makes more sense to actually begin your story during the warm-up to the race, not necessarily the moment when the gun goes off. Trust me, it doesn't have to be a super-long warm up. The reader doesn't want to read in excruciating detail about everything you ate the day before and how long you worked out and prepared for the race and get a description of every single stretch, not to mention get a vividly detailed account of the fashionable racing gear you were wearing. However, little set up is nice and lets you establish some stakes before the big action sets in.
So, to go back to that race analogy, I guess that sometimes it makes more sense to actually begin your story during the warm-up to the race, not necessarily the moment when the gun goes off. Trust me, it doesn't have to be a super-long warm up. The reader doesn't want to read in excruciating detail about everything you ate the day before and how long you worked out and prepared for the race and get a description of every single stretch, not to mention get a vividly detailed account of the fashionable racing gear you were wearing. However, little set up is nice and lets you establish some stakes before the big action sets in.
To give an example, I'm going to post the original first chapter of a historical novel I wrote last year. The story starts with a young girl, Kenna, my main character (MC) who has been trapped within some narrow streets in 17th century Edinburgh, has no friends and no shelter, and doesn't know where she'll find her next meal. She remembers finding her sister dead and knowing that her brother-in-law killed his wife, and is bent on revenge. THEN, I'm going to post my "new" first chapter where I take the reader to the point a few days prior, where Kenna actually witnesses her sister's death and makes the discovery her brother-in-law is the killer and must flee for her life.
I can't decide if I like my new first chapter better or not. It does give me the chance (in a following chapter) to show how Kenna becomes trapped where she is in the first place, and lets the reader get a glimpse of the life of comfort she had before she had to run away. Hm.....please comment and let me know what you think. Which Chapter One do you like better?
(Note: the format of the second chapter I posted is all screwed up. I'm not bothering to change it, so if if the weird indentations bother you, sorry). I would also apologize about writing in present tense, because I know it bugs some people, but I like it. So there.
KENNA’S CLOSE
By: Rebecca Bischoff
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER ONE
(Original: the one that "started too late in the story")
When I find Oliver, I
will plunge my knife into his heart. I
won’t trifle with potions, the method he used to murder his wife. I will not allow myself the luxury of
watching him die by inches, as pain fills his wretched soul. What I have learned in this filthy place echoing
with the squeal of rats and moans of the starving is that I will only have one
chance. I must not falter.
I only want to see Oliver’s
life breath leave his body. Then my
sister will rest, and so shall I.
Annie murmurs and
fidgets in her sleep. I place a hand upon
her matted hair, and my light touch is enough.
She quiets and her breathing slows.
The child clung to me the moment she saw me. Her eyes, like pools of clear water, pleaded
with me, though she said not a word. I
could not bear to push her away. Not in
a place like this. Here, I am certain
she cannot survive without me.
She told me her name,
after I fed her a bit of stolen bread.
But she has said nothing else. I
blow my breath out in a long stream. What
shall I do with the child? Why did she
have to choose me, plucking at my skirts as I passed? For it is not likely that I myself will
survive this place much longer. The Close
is my prison. If I am to live, and if I
am to have my revenge, I must find a way out.
Dawn approaches. I can tell by the feel in the air. Early morning light doesn’t truly penetrate
here. Only during a brief hour at midday
when the sun is directly overhead is it truly bright. At daybreak, there is only a gradual
lessening of the darkness, as though someone has pushed aside a curtain that
covers a filthy window and allowed a few weak rays to filter inside a room.
Careful not to disturb the
child, I rise from my bed, and nearly laugh aloud that I could think of it as
such. This is no more than a worn spot on
the cobbles, a tiny space between towering houses where I cower behind a barrel
left ages ago to rot. This corner has
become a refuge of sorts, out of view and out of reach of the slops thrown at
all hours from the upper windows. I have
but a single wall at my back and the stinking barrel to hide me from the
street. They provide no protection from
the weather. My bones ache with the
cold.
Stretching and rubbing
my back, I close my eyes and count the hours in my head. How long ago was I locked in the Close? My mind is sluggish, a slow-moving river
filled with thoughts that take an eternity to surface. My eyelids fly open. I am shocked when I realize that this is only
the start of my third day here. Already,
I fear that I shall not last much longer.
A babe cries from
somewhere above. Then a dog commences a
shrill barking and a man shouts to silence the creature. I am surrounded by walls of dark stone that team
with life, vile as it may be. These tall
houses hold many, many inhabitants, but every door is locked to me. A roof overhead is the one thing I do not
have.
I pat my pocket,
relieved to feel the solid presence of my knife. I’d taken it soon after arriving in the
Close. Not many hours had passed before
I knew I needed a weapon.
A sound like stone
clattering upon the cobbles reaches my ears and I duck down beside the child,
holding my breath. Has the Watchman
returned?
I chose this spot so as
to remain hidden at night, when The Watchman wanders up and down, up and down,
his footsteps interminable, echoing. He
must not find me. My captors spoke their
warning as they pushed me down crumbling steps and locked the gates behind me.
“Make certain ye keep
out of sight of the Watchman, lassie,” one of them had said. “All keep to their beds sundown to
sunup. If he finds you, it will no’ go
well for ye.”
They did not then tell
me that I would have to find a bed in the first place. Nor that no one in this dreadful place would
take pity upon me and offer one.
I hear nothing more. I stand, take a deep breath and wrinkle my
nose at the smells that invade my being.
I’m not yet used to the odor here.
Our latrine at home never smelled this bad. Mrs. Harris kept it clean by pouring lime
into it each week. Drains carried away
slops and kitchen scraps from the main house to the river. Our home smelled of beeswax polish and herbs
hung in the kitchen to dry. Baking bread
and fresh flowers.
I fear the stench of this place will
always be with me.
“Kenna?” Annie says.
“Yes,” I whisper. My heart lifts as I kneel beside her. “I’m here.”
If she will now speak, perhaps I shall be able to find her family.
“Hungry,” she
says.
“Well then,” I say,
patting her shoulder. The feel of her
thin frame, skin stretched over bone, calls to mind a starving cat I once
found. “Shall we find your mama?”
Her eyes regard me for
a long moment. I hold my breath.
“Hungry,” she
repeats. Her voice is not
plaintive. She knows far better than I
that hunger is a faithful companion whose claws never let go. I sigh.
“Let’s go, then,” I
say, helping her to her feet. She
clutches her doll and smiles at me, and I force my face into what I hope is a
cheery expression. I adjust my dress,
tightening the laces of the bodice and scratching at my dirty skin. My hair must look much as Annie’s does,
though I’ve tried to keep it braided and off my face.
We
ease past the barrel and pick our way into the street. All is quiet, except for the continued squalling
of the babe from a few stories above our heads.
The little one cries most of the time.
I’ve grown used to the sound.
Annie cradles her doll and shushes it.
The toy is no more than a scrap of tattered wool fallen from a
clothesline high above that I’d wrapped about a bit of wood. My heart turns over for a moment. Where is her family? I must find them, or someone to take her in. And I must escape this place!
Though we need food, I first
wish to ascertain that the gates remain closed.
It is a fool’s errand, I know, but I must see for myself. Hurrying as fast as I can manage while my
silly embroidered shoes slip and slide upon the cobbles, I drag the child
behind me and move to the head of the Close.
The Close is not a street, but a long and exceedingly narrow alleyway
between tall houses. Moreover, it is not
one but several such passageways, which all manage to twist themselves together
into a labyrinth of sorts. A carriage
would be hard-pressed to pass through.
Not that I’ve seen one.
The tall iron gates come
into view. Visible in the dawn light are
the sharp spikes at the top, high above my head. They are like black spears pointing to the
sky. The iron chains are yet in place. Locked.
I knew they would be, but I wished to make certain.
“Who goes there?” a voice calls from
the other side.
We melt into the shadows.
My heart has slowed by the time we
inch our way to the next gate, moving downhill.
This gate is located at the far opposite end of this stinking alleyway.
“Stewart’s,” I think they call it here.
Annie and I return to our corner but pass on, following the twists and
turns of the winding passage until we reach the northernmost end, many minutes
later. We pass a few souls already
about: a servant emptying slops onto the cobbles, a shopkeeper placing what few
remaining wares he has into his market stalls.
He eyes me with distrust as the child and I pass; certain, I am sure,
that I mean to steal one of the two wilted cabbages he possesses.
I am considering it. Though I have been raised to fear God, I never
knew how hunger could make one turn to sin until now.
We reach our
destination. Tall gates bar our way as
well. I can see the soldiers encamped on
the other side. Smoke from their fires
curls upon the cold morning air. I smell
something that makes my mouth water.
They are cooking meat over one of the fires. Game, perhaps, or is it a goose? I sniff the air, drawing in the scent like a
hound at the hunt. God, but I am hungry!
The soldiers do not starve. Why do they stand guard and keep us locked between
these iron gates so that all within will eventually perish with hunger? Who has given such orders? The Town Council? The King?
And why was I, a mere girl of fifteen, taken here?
It was Oliver who caused the
soldiers to lock me in here. It must be! Of that I am nearly certain, but the mystery
of why the Close has been sealed off from the rest of the city outside is not
yet clear to me.
Hearing footsteps approach, I pull
Annie to my side and sweep into a doorway.
Unfortunately, someone else was there before us.
“Shove off,” a rough voice grunts,
and a hard fist punches me in the side.
Gasping for air, I back away, trying to apologize but unable to form
words.
Annie whimpers as we move away,
stumbling along uneven cobbles. I turn
back, straining to see who approaches in the pale darkness of early morning.
A doorway opens and flickering light
allows me a glimpse of the hard face of Mr. Shaw, the baker. He is not one I’d wish to encounter
alone. His shop is back at the opposite
end of the Close, not far from my sleeping corner. He’s carrying what appears to be a heavy
parcel in his arms, and his eyes dart about as though he fears something. I know the look; I see it in the faces of
everyone here. I suppose I wear that
expression most of the time as well.
I back away, holding
tight to the child’s arm, and we press ourselves to the wall. Shaw passes by. He pays us no mind at all, and I sigh in
relief. Once his footsteps no longer
ring upon the cobbles, I move away from the wall but am stopped short when
something seizes my foot. I cry out as I
struggle, unable to break free. While
teetering and flinging my arms out in a wild manner as I seek to retain my
balance, I spy the thickly muscled arms that extend from between the bars of a
low window. Two large hands have a tight
grip upon my ankle.
“Don’t be alarmed,
pretty lass. Fancy coming down here to
give me a bit of company? I’ll share my
ale with you.”
“Let me be,” I blurt,
tugging and straining in vain against the ever-tightening grip. Annie begins to whimper.
“Use your blade, girl,”
a familiar voice grunts. It’s the person
from the doorway who struck me! Why should
he wish to assist us? Yet, with a gasp
of relief, I remember my knife. I’ve not
yet had occasion to use it, but circumstances warrant its use, and quick!
The clutching fingers
release me the moment I begin to slash at them.
Howls and curses emit from the low window as I hurry Annie away from the
spot.
“Best to stay on the other
side from now on when you pass by here,” my doorway companion says. “And keep your knife at the ready.”
“Thanks,” I manage to
breathe, now able to turn my attention to the man who assisted us. He is no taller than I and thin as a bundle
of sticks, and though the day has but begun and the light is still grey, I can
see the long years etched upon his face.
Annie clings to my side and I clutch my knife, wary of my so-called
protector, the one who punched me only moments before. I pray he can’t see how I tremble head to
foot.
“You’ve naught to eat I
warrant? That child is like to blow away
in a gust of wind,” the man says.
“Come.”
He marches up creaking
steps to the entrance of his home. I
hear the scrape and click of a key turning in a lock. I remain where I am, unsure, but Annie tugs
at my skirts, and my stomach is as empty as the tiny, crumbling chapel at the other
end of the Close, so reluctantly, I follow.
Inside, the man lights
a taper and sets it on a low wooden table.
He shuffles to another room and I look about me, keeping one hand on the
knife and another on the child’s shoulder, ready to flee at any moment. No telling what my protector actually
wants. It’s what I’ve learned in the
Close these past few days. Trust no one.
The room is bare and
worn. The stone walls weep with moisture. There is no fire in the grate, though I am
certain the man must feel the chill. His
beak-like nose is red with cold.
“Eat,” the man grunts,
as he shuffles back into the room carrying a trencher of bread and cheese,
which he places upon a little table. My
mouth waters at the sight. With a cry,
Annie darts over and seizes a bit of bread, stuffing it into her mouth.
“Easy, little mouse,”
the man says with a soft chuckle. “Go
slow or it’ll come back out. I know that
kind of hunger.”
“Do you,” I venture to
ask, snatching a bit of cheese. I wolf
it down in a manner that I know would have shocked my genteel sister, so proper
and dignified. Pushing away the memory
of her face, I reach for another piece.
“Aye,” the man
says.
That is all. Then he takes his own bit of bread and sits
upon a worn bench, the only other furniture I spy within the room. Close-cropped white hair caps his skull like
a sprinkling of ashy snow, and his face is crinkled as a shriveled potato. He stares at me as he munches, and his pale eyes,
peering out as they do from between folds of ancient skin, regard me with
calculation.
What does he want? I must be wary.
Annie makes whimpering
noises as she eats, taking bites that are far too large. I shush her, though I can hardly blame her
for eating like an animal. We had naught
but potato peelings yesterday.
My shoulders sag as I
chew. I used to come here to give
charity. With my sister, I handed out
food from baskets Mrs. Harris prepared each Sunday. I was proud to say I fed the poor. But I shrank from the grabbing, grubby
fingers that reached for the pitiful offerings I so officiously gave.
Now, my own filthy
hands are grateful for any bit of food they can find.
A wheezy chuckle interrupts
my musings.
“You don’t belong here,”
the man says, dipping his head at me.
“How do you know that?”
I curl my fingers
around the handle of the knife in my pocket as I speak.
“I know who you are, Poisoner. We all do.
You’re that uppity granddaughter of Lord Ramsay who murdered her sister.”
CHAPTER ONE
(Newer one, where I move the story back to a few days earlier)
Ladies
do not scramble up the outer walls of their homes with their skirts hiked up and
bound about their knees. They do not
cling to trellises filled with shriveled roses, pricking their fingers upon
thorns and biting back oaths they are not supposed to know as they push open the
windows of chambers they were forbidden to enter.
How
Grandfather would chide me, though always with a spark of amusement in his
eye. How Oliver would freeze me with his
stern gaze! He takes upon himself the
role of father when it suits him, which is usually when Kenna has behaved in an unseemly manner once again. He
sheds the role of parent most of the time, though, removing it from his person
as one flicks a bit of dust from his sleeve.
I
land with a soft thump upon the carpets in my sister’s chamber. She moans and stirs but does not open her
eyes.
The
room smells of dust and something sour like curdled milk. Wrinkling my nose, I fling the curtains wide
and leave the casements open, though the air is cool and filled with the gray autumn
mist that descends upon our hills this time of year.
Oliver’s
orders are that the heavy curtains are to be kept drawn tight in his wife’s
chamber. It is as though my sister is
not allowed to know the day from the night.
Her husband insists the sunlight hurts her eyes.
I
do not believe him. I need light, at any
rate. With my bare foot, (climbing is
near to impossible wearing one’s slippers) I shove a stool close to Cinaed’s
bed and sit, pulling the bit of parchment filched from Grandfather’s desk from my skirts. And I begin. Squinting, I sketch a few lines, regard them
with more than a tinge of criticism, and add more lines to my drawing. My sister is both mother and father to
me. She has been since the time our
parents died, so long ago their faces do not come to mind. I cannot bear the thought that one day I may
no longer recall my sister’s image, either.
If
she does not recover. But she must! I cannot lose her!
I
am only drawing her portrait because she has asked me to, so many times. That is why.
There. That is much better. I had first made the mistake of recreating in
exactness what I saw before me, drawing the curve of my sister’s cheek,
shrunken with illness. Scrubbing with my
fingers, I redraw her as I remember her before.
Round cheeks and clear eyes that dart about, quick like a robin’s.
Cinaed’s
eyes are the color of storm clouds. They
mask her true nature. Hers is a
disposition far more akin to a day of bright sun than to a brooding sky filled
with the promise of cold rain. I shall
never forget her smile. Frowning, I
trace the lines of my drawing with a smudged finger. It is still not right!
“Miss,”
our maid, Lorna, says. Yelping in
surprise, I dart to my feet. I had not
once noticed her, sitting silent in the shadows in the far corner, her knitting
in her lap. Treacherous little snip! She will likely flee and tell Oliver what I
have done in her sniveling voice.
I
scowl at her, knowing my face betrays the frustration I feel, and caring not
one whit.
Lorna
rises with her yarns in her hands and bobs a timid curtsy. “Please, miss,” she falters, “It is nearly
twelve o’clock. The physician will be
here, and Sir Oliver says no one is allowed in.”
“No,”
I say from between clenched teeth. My
drawing is not right. “I’ll not leave
until I have finished!”
“Yes,”
Oliver announces, entering swiftly and sweeping me off my stool as our cook
might shoo a kitten away from her favorite chair. “You
shall. The physician has arrived.”
I
plead with my eyes, but my sister’s husband does not bother to look upon
me. He marches to stand beside the bed
of his wife, whose damp hair clings to her glistening forehead, and whose pale
cheeks have sunken into her face, giving her the look of a crone rather than a
woman not yet thirty. Her illness caused
some of her teeth to fall out. She lost
another this morning. It still lies upon
the tray on the carved table beside the bed.
No one bothered to remove it. The
chip of bone tinged with red holds my gaze for a moment, and my stomach sours
at the sight. I am glad my sister does
not appear to be aware of her surroundings.
For the past three days she has not.
Dismissed,
I close the door softly behind me and bite my tongue against the many retorts I
would hurl at the man who calls himself my brother. The thick carpets beneath my feet are a
mockery to me. Oliver’s fool idea! They were unrolled in the corridors only
yesterday so that my sister need not be disturbed by the sound of passing
footsteps.
My
sister is not dead. Why does Oliver
insist we creep about upon silent feet, as though we are in a church?
“Ah,
Kenna,” Grandfather murmurs my name. His
tall form approaches from the direction of the stairs. Thanks to the carpets, I had not heard his
usually heavy, measured tread. I flee to
his side and he places his arms about me, holding me so close I feel his heart
beating. “Do not fret so, child. No, do not fret, my dear.”
“She
is so ill,” I murmur into his coat. He
smells of apples and mulled wine, as though he has come from the kitchens. Our paths cross often when we sneak into the
larder searching for a bit of sweet or sip of claret. Comrades in household thievery we are,
causing no end of grief to Mrs. Harris. Stepping
back, I swipe at my tears and straighten my shoulders. Aside from our clandestine meetings over
midnight repasts, Grandfather does expect me to behave like a lady, after
all.
“Grandfather,
Cinaed is so ill! What can we do?” I ask
him.
Grandfather
eyes crinkle as he smiles down at me. He
is weary. I can see it in the dark
smudges and bags beneath his great blue eyes, but I still feel comfort from the
strength that emanates from him. He
squeezes my shoulder.
“My
good friend and physician, Sir Robert Ogilvie, is here, Kenna. He shall help your poor sister. I am certain of it.”
Swallowing
the lump in my throat, I back away and finally remember my manners in time to sink
in an ungainly curtsy at the sight of the portly man beside Grandfather. As I do so, I feel the air upon my bare legs
and remember my knotted skirts and bare feet.
I do not even wear stockings! Cheeks
stinging with the flush that creeps upon them, I struggle to untie the knots I
have made in the brightly colored stuff of my lemon-yellow skirts.
Smoothing
my crumpled skirts, I lift my gaze in time to spy the clear look of disapproval
the esteemed physician wears upon his round and thoroughly unpleasant face. His head is shaped like an egg; wider at the
bottom than the top, as his chin simply dissolves into the folded flesh of his
neck. His coat is mussed and he wears a
look of self-importance. I do not like
his demeanor.
“I
shall certainly do all within my power to help your sister, lass,” the man says
in a smooth voice that is surprisingly high-pitched. “Though I must say I’ve not heard of such a
case before.”
“Please,
sir,” I begin to say, but that is all I can manage. My throat closes.
Grandfather
pats my shoulder again. “Go, Kenna. The tailor and Mrs. Harris await you in your
chambers. Oliver has ordered you a new
dress. You must try it on.” He pauses and wipes his brow. “Go, lass,” he repeats.
A new dress?
I
stare after Grandfather and the haughty physician who hurry down the silent
hall and disappear inside my sister’s chamber.
My drawing falls from numb fingers.
Does
Oliver truly believe that all shall be well with me if I have a new dress? Never mind that my sister lay dying! Kenna shall have pretty new clothes.
Does
he believe that is all I care for?
Rage
surges like boiling oil through my body.
I shall show Oliver what I think of my new dress!
“Kenna,”
Mrs. Harris gasps as I burst through the doors of my chamber. “What is it, my dear?”
“Go!”
I scream, pointing at the elderly woman and the straw-haired young man who
waits with her. His mouth gapes wide and
he stares, giving him the appearance of a scaly herring lying in a market
stall.
“Leave
NOW!”
Our
old housekeeper hurries out of the room with her handkerchief over her face.
The tailor follows. My entire body
trembles. I should be ashamed for how I
have treated the kindly woman, but I can feel nothing but the anger that surges
through my veins. I am tipsy with the
feeling, unsteady on my feet as though I have taken too much wine.
The
dress lies upon my bed. It is silk, the color
of soot. Ribbons, lace, the finest of stitches,
nearly invisible.
Mourning
garb. Oliver does not think to distract
me with pretty things. He sends a
message.
My
shoulders sag at the sight and I bury my face in my hands.
“She
is not dead,” I say. I raise my face and
gulp air. “She is not dead!” I shout.
The
tailor left his satchel upon the table.
I rifle through it until I locate his scissors. They slice through the silk with ease. Within moments, the remains of my dress
slither to the floor, slain by my own hands.
I step back to admire the sight, a pool of ink at my feet.
A
new black dress. Carpets upon the floors
to muffle our footsteps. And even straw
scattered upon the cobbles outside, to muffle the sound of passing hooves. Oliver ordered it this morning.
Slowly,
I turn and move to the window. A gust of
early November wind tosses withered leaves against the glass. They tap and hiss like the voices of spirits
seeking shelter.
Were
any lost spirits to entreat me for welcome, I should warn them they seek to
enter a place that holds as much joy as a graveyard.
My
sister’s lute lies upon a table. I took
it from her chambers after she fell ill.
The hint of a song whispers in the air as my fingers brush against the
strings. A teardrop splashes against the
polished wood.
Cinaed
loves music and singing. She loves the
sound of the larks upon the branches outside her window; even the crows as they
cark and caw in the fields come autumn.
She dearly loves to laugh. Why
must we remain so silent? Though she
lies weak and mute, perhaps she still hears what transpires around her. Would she not wish to hear the voices of
those who are most beloved? Would that
not cheer her heart and help her grow strong once more?
I
nearly trip upon my skirts as I pivot on my heel. And as
I fly to my sister’s chamber, I spy the heads of Grandfather and his physician
as they descend the stairs, their voices indistinct. Oliver’s low baritones murmur as well. Good. There
shall be no one to chase me away.
According
to our music master, my voice is not nearly so lovely as Oliver’s, yet it will
do. My sister’s husband no longer sings
for her. Well, then. I
shall.
Her
chamber is stifling. The fire roars in
the grate. Beneath the coverlet, my
sister’s body is slight. I seize her
hand, startled at how cold it is.
“Cinaed,”
I murmur. “It’s Kenna, come to sing for
you.”
She
breathes in and out again, her lips quiver.
Her eyelids flutter.
My
voice is hardly above a whisper when I begin.
The lullaby is one my sister used to sing to me when I feared the
shadows of night.
The swallows are gone, I manage to warble, quite off-key. My wretched voice! It is hardly more than a croak. I breathe in and try again.
The summer has flown. Dear little child, come with me.
My voice
trembles and I must pause once more to draw breath. Cinaed’s cracked lips part and I lean closer,
but she does not speak. I brush her hair
from her face and stroke her cheek while I continue to sing.
The world shall await, ‘ere long you are grown, but
for now you shall sleep…
“Oliver!” my sister gasps. Her eyes open and she thrashes about, bucking
and kicking like a new colt.
I
leap to my feet and turn to call for aid, but before I utter a sound Oliver
flings the door wide and hurtles inside.
“What
are you doing here, Kenna?” he growls.
“Leave her be!”
Oliver
flies to Cinaed’s bed and kneels beside her.
My sister seizes her husband’s waistcoat with one flailing fist and with
the other hand scratches at his eyes; though I do not believe she is aware of
what she does. In vain, Oliver struggles
to detach her hands and to hold his wife’s slight form still. The velvet tears and he shrugs it off and
flings the torn clothing to the floor.
“Go,
Kenna,” he calls, turning his head to me.
His face is contorted with pain.
A livid streak of red creases one cheek.
“Seek the physician! He cannot
have gone yet!”
I
do not move. It is as though my feet are
woven into the stuff of the carpet beneath them. I cannot do what Oliver says, for I have
finally allowed myself to admit what everyone else sought to tell me. I know now that it is too late to call for
aid.
My
sister is dying.
The
pain of my realization nearly causes me to sink to the floor. I clamp a hand over my mouth and bite my lip
to keep from crying out.
Wrapped
in her husband’s tight grip, Cinaed convulses once, twice. Her eyes lose their wild look, and for a
brief moment, I believe that she is coming to herself. Oliver bends his head so that their faces
nearly touch.
I
step forward, holding my breath. It is
as though I am gazing at a painting, a tableau of tender intimacy, something I
should not witness. My heart turns over.
My
sister gazes into the eyes of her husband, so close at hand. He murmurs words, too soft for me to hear. Cinaed listens. Her ebony hair spills across her pillow; her face
is pale as chalk. Her body is nothing
but skin tight across sharp bone. Her
eyes, far too large, gaze at her husband with an intense longing. The love she possesses for this man is
written in every single pain-caused line on her wasted face.
I
take another step and my foot touches something upon the floor. It is Oliver’s torn waistcoat. Reaching down to move it aside, my fingers
brush against something smooth and cold.
Beneath the fallen waistcoat lies a tiny bottle. I close my hand around it.
Oliver
continues to murmur low words to his wife.
His eyes are upon only her, so that he does not see what I have found.
I
recognize the bottle at once. It is the
same poison we use to kill rats and mice in the barns.
Cinaed
gasps for air. The sound pierces
me. Then my sister breathes out once
more, a long, slow sigh. And she is
still, though her eyes remain fixed on my brother, a heartbeat away.
For
several long moments, I stay where I am, clutching the glass bottle, staring at
my sister’s beloved face, willing her to breathe again. But she does not.
Oliver
finally turns in my direction. His eyes
are dry and his face is a mask of utter stillness. Until he sees what I hold in my hand.
“Kenna,”
he says in a strangled voice. His eyes
dart from the bottle to my face and back again.
Something dawns in his eyes. Something
cold and fierce. And his face contorts
and darkens.
I
stumble backwards, clutching the bottle to my chest. He killed her. He
killed her! This man has murdered
his wife, my only sister!
Oliver
rises to his feet.
I
scream.
Friday, September 4, 2015
Revisiting Revising: Contests Can Help
This summer was a season of revising for me. I have written six complete novels so far, and three of them need serious work. So, I spent some quality time on revising, editing, changing and fixing them. This meant I ignored housework and other less-necessary items on my "to do" list while I poured over, worried over, and agonized over my books. Good times! Seriously, I love writing and even revising, so it wasn't half as bad as I made it sound.
Well, this summer was also a time of contests for me. Brenda Drake's fabulous site, www.brenda-drake.com, offers lots and lots of them, and I highly recommend entering. Just to make this immediately clear, I didn't "win" anything or really get that far in any of the contests I entered. However, I got some outstanding advise from several of the contest judges (or mentors) who were incredibly kind and emailed me their suggestions, even when they didn't chose my entered manuscripts.
Along with the contests I entered, I participated in a July workshop where authors would critique 1st pages sent in to the site. I swallowed my pride, since the way this is set up is that after you enter, your writing, along with any suggested changes or advice, will appear on Brenda Drake's site for the world to see. Gulp. That was a little hard to swallow, but I did it anyway, and I'm glad I did. Here's a link to brenda-drake.com on the day that my work was critiqued. It was hard to put myself out there like that, but I'm glad I did. The advice I got was solid and made me look much more carefully at the entire novel.
Keep writing and definitely keep revising, and if you can stand the idea, enter a contest or two. You may learn something that will make your writing sing. (Or, you may be far better than I am and actually win the contest!) :-)
Thursday, May 21, 2015
Entry for "The Writer's Voice" Contest
Query:
Dear Mr./Ms. XXXXX,
As the granddaughter of an Earl, fifteen-year-old Kenna
Somerled is used to a life of privilege and ease. But in the fall of 1665, when
her sister dies under mysterious circumstances, Kenna discovers the killer and
must flee for her own safety. Instead of
a refuge, she finds herself locked behind the guarded gates of the Close, a
warren of narrow alleyways in the poorest section of Edinburgh, with no money,
friends, or shelter. What’s worse is
that somehow, word of her arrival preceded her.
To the residents of the Close, Kenna is “the Poisoner,” a girl who murdered
her own sister. Armed only with her wits
and a stolen knife, hampered by a young street urchin who has latched onto her,
Kenna must seek any means to survive.
Kenna gradually gains the trust of mysterious benefactors, but soon discovers they are none other than the leaders of the Guild, a band of thieves who steal from the
dead. Bent on escaping the locked
streets and seeking revenge for the murder, Kenna joins the thieves. In so doing, she begins to learn the secrets
of the Close and its residents, and gain their respect as they earn hers in
return. But time is running out, for the
so-called quarantine that locks all within the Close continues with no end in sight and
Kenna now has a price on her head. With
no supplies going in our out, food grows scarce and the residents of the Close grow
restless and angry. Kenna must have the
aid of the Guild in order to escape. But
will Kenna’s new friends be able to trust her when her own secret is revealed?
“KENNA’S CLOSE,” a YA historical novel set in 17th
century Edinburgh, is complete at 76,000 words.
I have been a member of the Society of Children’s Book Writers and
Illustrators since 2008, and have written other novels, including contemporary
and historical genres. I’ve worked as a
speech-language pathologist for many years, a profession that continues to
increase my love for children’s literature.
I appreciate your time and
consideration.
Sincerely,
Rebecca Bischoff
First 250 Words:
KENNA'S CLOSE
When I find Oliver, I
will plunge my knife into his heart. I
won’t trifle with potions, the method he used to murder his wife. I will not allow myself the luxury of
watching him die by inches, as pain fills his wretched soul. What I have learned in this filthy place
echoing with the squeal of rats and moans of the starving is that I will only
have one chance. I must not falter.
I only want to see
Oliver’s life breath leave his body.
Then my sister will rest, and so shall I.
She told me her name,
after I fed her a bit of stolen bread.
But she has said nothing else. I
blow my breath out in a long stream.
What shall I do with the child?
Why did she have to choose me, plucking at my skirts as I passed? For it is not likely that I myself will
survive this place much longer. The Close
is my prison. If I am to live, and if I
am to have my revenge, I must find a way out.
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Chen Loves His Mummy
I was watching a National Geographic special the other day about Caucasian-looking mummies found in the Tarim Basin in China. I couldn't help chuckling as one man, someone in charge of some of the mummies kept at a museum, waxed poetic about one particularly well-preserved body. "If I lived in her day, or if she were alive today, I would marry this woman. She is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen," he said.
"Wow, he needs to get out more," I thought to myself. True, she looked pretty good for someone who'd been dead for centuries. Most bodies don't look too great after a while in the ground. Anyway, that prompted me to write this silly, sappy short story. I posted it as a comment in my friend's blog, "Write Now Anyway," but had to do it anonymously, since I'm terrible with computers and couldn't get logged in. I decided to also post it here on my blog. Just a random bit of silliness for a random Tuesday. I like to call it:
Chen Loves His Mummy
Present Day
XinJiang Region,
China
“Good morning, my love,” he
whispered. She did not respond. He knew she would not; yet, he couldn’t help
it. His soft greeting must be the first
sound to reach her each day.
He felt it right away; what he
could only describe as a slight “shimmer” in the air. It wasn’t an audible sound, yet Chen had long
ago learned to recognize it. She was
letting him know that she heard him. And
she was pleased.
Chen Hai smiled to himself as
uncovered dusty glass cases. This room, her
room, was in a far corner of the building.
It was no more than a wooden addition tacked on when interest in the new
acquisitions first brought attention to Chen’s insignificant museum. Surely no one outside of China, no, perhaps
even no man outside his own province, had even heard of the town before. Then, Chen had found her. Now, his tiny town perched on the edge of the
brutal Takla Makan desert was known to many.
Scientists from the world over had come to visit. A crew
from National Geographic had just packed up and left the day before.
He was glad that the foreigners had
left. Signing in relief, Chen hit the
switch to turn on the overhead lights.
At first they buzzed like angry horseflies, but finally, the room was
bathed with a soft, though inadequate glow.
Now that they were gone, those lank Westerners with their cameras and
questions and sun burnt flesh, he relished the silence. He turned to her.
“Did you enjoy your moment in the
spotlight?” he asked, feeling a slight flush creep over his face. More than two years in her presence and he
was still so shy!
While he waited for a response,
Chen busied himself with his morning routine.
First, he replaced the flowers in the vase beside her bed. Then, he dusted every imaginable surface. Grit got everywhere in this harsh, brown land,
blowing in upon the interminable wind through the tiniest of cracks. Once Chen had gotten sick, and had not come
for several days. Upon his return, he
was shocked by the thick layers of dust.
He knew it had hurt her very badly that he had neglected her
comfort. She had not spoken to him for
weeks.
She spoke now. Chen felt as though a tiny bird were beating
its wings inside his chest.
“I am glad of it,” he said, hearing
the tremor in his voice. He put his
cloth away. “Now for your hair.”
She liked it plaited, with brightly
colored wool threads woven throughout the long braids. Chen made certain that her hair was perfect
each day.
She was pleased. The air crackled with electricity as she
spoke to Chen, sharing her secrets.
Telling him of her gratitude. Her
love.
He arranged her cloak, his hands
caressing the rough woven fibers. The
colors were so bright. They suited his
lady, with her flowing locks and her face like the carving of an ancient goddess. Her long, lean limbs. Chen sighed aloud.
“Will you permit me, my love?” he
murmured. The assent came
immediately. His heart would burst
inside him! He leaned down, his lips
searching for hers.
“Chen! What are you doing?”
Laughter burst from behind and
echoed through the small chamber. The
harsh sounds pummeled Chen all over his body; hard, painful jabs. Zhu Tan, the museum’s director, as well as
his assistant, Ping, and several other workers crowded into the narrow doorway
to stare, laughing so hard tears poured down their cheeks.
“He’s making out with the mummy
again,” one of the younger assistants said, gasping for air. “You win, guys! I never would have believed it! Guess I owe you all a drink tonight after
work!”
Chen shoved past them and
fled. Their laughter remained in his
head long after he reached his apartment.
She called out for him, desperation and loneliness clear in her voice. Her voice reached him even there, blocks
away. He would not leave her alone with
them.
It was a simple matter to puncture
a hole through the room’s thin wooden walls.
The next morning, the museum director found the hole, as well as the
empty bed. Nothing else had been
disturbed.
Twenty Years Later:
Li
Sheng stared at her newest find. She’d been
excavating the cache of Caucasian mummies in the Takla Makan desert for quite
some time. Now that China’s silly desire
to preserve its long-cherished cultural beliefs about existing in a vacuum with
no outside influence was finally waning somewhat, she and the others in her
international team had made fascinating discoveries.
The
cave held many surprises. But this one
took her breath away. She did not
understand.
The
first mummy was that of a woman. Tall,
with long braided hair and the distinctly Causcasian features of the other
mummies of the Tarim Basin, she wore a colorful cloak. She was very old. Two or three thousand years, at least. She lay in a semi-reclined position, her arms
folded upon her chest. Li Sheng
frowned. This mummy was what she’d
expected. But the other one was not.
The
other mummy, sitting beside the woman, was clearly the remains of a Chinese
man. Short of stature, his facial
features were frozen in a look of peaceful complacency. And instead of the coarsely woven wool
clothing of the other mummies, he wore a…cotton t-shirt! Li Sheng leaned closer and raised her
flashlight. A National Geographic logo
was on the front of the man’s shirt.
Jeans covered his legs and his feet were clad in a dusty pair of Nikes.
Swallowing
bile, Li Sheng backed away. She’d call
the police. Someone must have used this
cave to hide their murder victim.
As she
turned to go, a strange feeling shot through the air, almost like a spark of
electricity. Li Sheng’s hair stood on
end. Slowly, she turned.
The
Chinese man’s head now rested upon the shoulder of the tall woman, whose long,
brown arms were wrapped possessively about her companion. Li Sheng blinked. Then, she cursed, and turned to run. She needed a drink.
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